Yesterday was the first day of school for my boys. My oldest started 3rd grade and my youngest started Kindergarten. On the first day of school, parents who do 'drop-off' (instead of bus or before/after school care) have to walk their kids to class. So I drop off my oldest, as he's been through this before and then bring my youngest to his Kindergarten class. He walks right in, sits in his chair and starts his worksheet. Doesn't say see ya, good bye, love ya, nice knowing you, NOTHING! I just stare at him and think, holy cow, all I have done for the past almost 9 years is stay home with these boys and do everything for them. I remember those first *miserable* sleepless nights (I don't care HOW much you love that baby, getting no sleep just plain sucks!) to the first teeth, first steps, first words, first tantrums, first day of preschool, first trip to Disneyland (about 3 weeks ago :)), and now, my last child is now in Kindergarten going to school all day. As a SAHM, much of your identity rests in that role and of caring for those kids day in and day out. When you're in the throws of diapers and spit up and tantrums, you think it will never end, but I promise you it does. As I sit here typing this, the house is quiet, the tv is off, no one is yelling for me to wipe their bum (that'll be after school-ha!) or make them a snack. And I have to say that the quiet is in a sense, defening. I know in a few hours they'll come home and it'll be back to the usual, but for these quiet moments, I feel a little lost. I know with time I will get used to the quiet, to the grocery shopping in peace, but yeah, I definitely can sense that one *HUGE* chapter of my life is over and I am about to embark on a new, wonderful and different journey now.
I look forward to getting my life more organized and being on a routine now that the boys are gone. I have three major goals for myself this school year. The first is to get up and showered at 7 before the boys wake up. I used to just roll out of bed when they woke me up, but this was not very conducive to getting out the door and to school on time. My son was tardy several times last year, which is not good for his academic success and I have no one to blame for that but myself. Secondly, my goal is to turn off the PC from 3-8pm (when they get home till their bedtime) and also in the a.m. before school. I have found over the years that the PC is such a distraction from my daily interaction with my boys after school and honestly, they've been fighting over who gets to use the PC every day. My final goal for this year is to read them a little devotional every morning while they eat breakfast. I got this idea from my friend Morgan over at Becoming Homegrown and I love how it gives us a few minutes of meaningful interaction during the hustle and bustle of getting ready for school in the a.m.
Finally, I also feel that these first few weeks of this school year are the calm before the storm. Next month, my husband starts his MBA program at Arizona State University, which is going to leave me with even more alone time with the boys as he'll be gone about 20 extra hours a week and I know it'll be a huge adjustment for all of us. Then in January the biggest change will come for me, when I will be starting nursing school and will be gone myself four days a week. I know that these changes are going to be huge for the boys, but I also know that in the long run these things will only make a better life for them and also teach them about perserverance, setting goals and accomplishing them through hard work and dedication.
